Audience of One

Have you ever noticed how truly exhausting it is when you worry and fret over what other people think of you? Questioning your steps, hesitating over your choices, doubting your abilities - it's so draining when we let the fear of people thinking negatively about us guide our lives. 

We don't sing because we fear people will think we sound tone deaf.

We don't dance because we fear people will compare us to flamingos with no rhythm.

We don't speak because we fear people will think our opinions and views are foolish.

We don't write because we fear people will view our work as nonsensical drivel.

We don't chase our dreams because we fear people will tell us we're idiots to believe our dreams are attainable. 

When we are governed by a fear of measuring up, we live a life that is stifled and stagnant. The fear can grow and fester until it's affecting every area of our lives. We don't feel like we can ever just be ourselves because we're always having to keep up the act and put on a great performance so that people will approve of us. 

Our lives become the stage and everyone else, our (seemingly) critical audience. 

Personally, I've always struggled with the fear of what others think about me. For whatever reason, I've never believed that I measure up in other people's eyes. This fear has often kept me from doing things I've wanted to do and from chasing my dreams.

                                               Photo credit - BeckyRosty.wordpress.com

Recently, God's been gently healing and freeing me from these fears of man's opinions. He's used my husband, JRB, to help me see myself in a different light and become the girl I've always wanted to be. Though I've still got a long ways to go, I can now look back at the girl I used to be and see the progress to the girl I am today. It's so awesome to me when I see how much God has used this incredible man to help me grow in this area.

JRB is a very positive influence in my life. In the moments when I get sucked down into the pit of "I'm not good enough" land, he helps guide me back out with his encouragement and love. Sometimes the situations are more humorous and quirky, while others are more serious and heartfelt. No matter what type of situation it is, he's always there for me.

Growing up, whenever I envisioned a home of my own, I pictured a place where I felt free to just be myself without fear of judgements. A place where I could totally let my guard down and not worry about being criticized. I wanted to be able to be a silly, crazy, goofy mess whenever the mood would strike. With JRB, I have that freedom :)

I tell you all this because (a) being married to JRB has helped me learn more of what it means to live a life for the audience of One and (b) I'm crazy in love with this awesome man and I want to share with the world how blessed I am to be his wife.

I've always loved Big Daddy Weave's song, "Audience of One." If you've read other blog posts of mine then I'm sure you're aware of how often music is what I use to express myself. Because of my fears of people's opinions, this song has always been a favorite of mine. The thought of living my life with Him as my sole audience is invigorating! A life where I'm no longer governed by the need for and seeking of man's applause, but am instead concerned only with His approval… I think that would be a truly beautiful thing.

I've glimpsed that life in different moments of my own life, times when I've been at rest in the knowledge that Christ's opinion of me is the only one that matters. Those times? Oh my, they're so full of peace and happiness. There's such freedom in those moments because I'm able to just be. I'm not forced to put on a show meant to impress Him, because I know He loves me. He sees me, I mean truly sees me, and He loves me anyway. 

                                           Photo credit - helpingbringlevihome.blogspot.com

A life that's not hindered by people's opinions. A life that's not filled with concerns about man's judgements. A life that's not bogged down by the fear of not being good enough. This is the life available to us through Jesus, a life lived in His freedom and love. A life I am actively seeking to live out. 

Through my marriage I have received a visible portrayal of how my audience of One may view me (though I know JRB's affection for me is a minute amount compared to God's love for me.) Though there are times when I'm still self-conscious in front of JRB, over the course of our relationship I've allowed myself to sink into the knowledge that I can trust my husband to love me, all the pieces that make up me, and accept me just as I am. 

I can dance around the house looking like a fool because I know he isn't going to mock me. I can burst out in song, singing whatever comes to mind, because I know he's not critiquing my voice. I can speak to him because I know, whether he agrees with me or not, he's not going to call me an idiot or a fool. I can share my heart through letters to him (and on a larger scale through this blog) because I know that he'll see more than just words and that he'll treasure this part of me. I can chase my dreams because I know he'll be supportive and encouraging of me doing so.

I know that I don't have to pretend in order to please my husband, that I don't have to put on a show for him to make him think I'm worthwhile. I don't have to hide all my messy flaws and imperfections to gain his approval. JRB has taken the time to know me, to learn my fears and failures, my pains and heartbreaks. He doesn't only love the nice and clean parts of me, he loves it all. Every piece that makes up A. Blair is a piece my husband loves. 

If my husband, who is an imperfect man with his own flaws and failures, can love and accept me just as I am, what causes me to hesitate to believe that my perfect God will do it on an even grander scale? Isn't it the need to be loved and wanted that truly drives us to do everything we can to get other people's good opinions of us?

So what would happen, then, if we lived our lives as if we fully believed that we're already loved and wanted? Wouldn't our lives change so greatly if we were living them only for the pleasure of our Lord? If we would stop worrying about what man's thinking and only concern ourselves with God's opinion - how different do you think life would be?

Would you care to join me in finding out? Come, Friend, let's pursue a life lived wholly for the glory and honor of our Abba. Let us live our lives for the pleasure of our exclusive audience of One.

                                               Photo credit - Daystar

Audience of One

I come on my knees

To lay down before You

Bringing all that I am

Longing only to know You

Seeking Your face

And not only Your hand

I find You embracing me

Just as I am

And I lift these songs

To You and You alone

As I sing to You

In my praises make Your home

**To my audience of One

You are Father and You are Son

As Your Spirit flows free

Let it find within me

A heart that beats to praise You

And now just to know You more

Has become my great reward

To see Your kingdom come

And Your will be done

I only desire to be Yours, Lord**

So what could I bring

To honor Your majesty

What song could I sing

That would move the heart of royalty

And all that I have

Is the life that You've given me

So, Lord, let me live for You

My song with humility

And, Lord, as the love song

Of my life is played

I have one desire

To bring glory to Your name

****

Perfect God > Imperfect Humanity

Dear Hesitant One,

Do you remember that trip you took as a new teen to that big ole youth conference in another country? The hours of traveling in the van that still smelled faintly of a pig farm, the amount of people surrounding you at every turn, the reassuring presence of your siblings and youth group around you. Remember that trip? It's the first (and last) one you attended. It was filled with worship and teaching at the meetings, then late night yawns and giggles back at the hotel room. 

                                                     *Photo credit - gracefullmama.com

Do you know what else was there? Or, I should say, who else was there.

Along with the numerous people there to praise Jesus' name and draw closer to Him, the enemy of your soul was slithering and prowling, looking for any moments where he could slip in and cause a disturbance, a scene, a weakening. He was looking for ways to instill doubt, cause fear, and plant his lies.

Sadly, he succeeded with you.

In one of the meetings, the leader asked for any of the teens who were needing prayer to lift their hands. Then he requested that only the youth group leaders, chaperones, and/or adults pray for those individuals. In that time, you and a close friend saw one of your other friends waiting on prayer and, noticing that all of your leaders were praying for others at the moment, you two stepped up and began to pray for her while she waited. Then your youth pastor got your attention and told you to stop praying (albeit nicely) for her because you were not part of the "leaders."

In that moment, a lie of the enemy  took root in your life. A lie born of fear - the fear of accidentally/innocently doing something you're not supposed to be doing and then being called out for it. Over the course of those few seconds, your freedom in Christ to pray for others took a direct blow and, without even realizing it, you tucked a big part of that innocent girl away behind a wall to protect her from any future embarrassment. There she has stayed for many years, safe.

I see you there, Little One. Confused and embarrassed, not understanding why your innocent desire to pray for a hurting friend back then was seen as "wrong" in the eyes of those adults. It doesn't make sense to you why they would ever ask teenagers to stop praying. Because, really, you could've sworn what they'd been trying to do in youth group was always get you to pray more. But suddenly… you were being told to stop and the enemy slipped in with the spaces between those words and, unbeknownst to you, made himself at home with his lies.

"You're not good enough to pray for others." 

"Don't step out and pray, you'll only get in trouble."

"God requires prayers of a godlier person than you."

"Your prayers aren't at a deep enough level to make any difference."

Now you fear being made a spectacle of, fear getting in trouble. You so hate getting in trouble… The enemy took your youth pastor's words and twisted them around for his own evil doings. Your pastor wasn't rebuking you nor condemning you, he was simply doing what the conference leader had asked of him. Whether it was right or wrong of him to cease your praying, his intentions weren't to cause you embarrassment. That all came about through the enemy's lies.

That one moment is at the root of your hesitation over praying for someone else who's requested prayer. Your mind fills with questions similar to:

"Am I allowed to be praying?" "Am I going to get called out if I go pray for so-and-so?" "Are only the elders, leadership, and pastor supposed to be praying for these people?" 

You feel guilty for hesitating, especially since you don't understand why you hesitate. Believe me, I know. The impact of that moment at that long ago youth conference isn't even in your brain. You have no idea that that is at the root of your fear. But I recently received the revelation over it and I just had to pass it on to you, Young One. 

Due to that moment, when the Spirit moves inside you and you feel a need to approach someone and pray, you'll hesitate. You won't just simply step out in response to the prompting because you did that before and a man stopped you.

Read that last sentence again, Friend, because therein lies a truth you need to grasp. "… a man stopped you." 

Perfect God did not ask you to stop praying in that moment, imperfect humanity did.

                                               *Photo found on lovedbythesavior.tumblr.com

Do you feel the freedom in that? God wants to hear your voice, He wants you to pray to Him. Big things, little things, and everything in between. He wants to hear you speak about them all. He loves when you talk to Him, He loves when you share your heart with Him. He wants you in fellowship with others and praying on their behalf. He wants you to use your voice to pray for your friends.

So lift up your voice, Hesitant One, and pray in your blood-won freedom!

"Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may find mercy and grace in time of need." - Hebrews 4:16

Take a step back, Young One, and have another look at the situation. Trust that those leaders were doing what they felt was right, that they never intended to harm or hinder you. Remember that leaders make mistakes too and allow for the fact that maybe it just wasn't communicated in the right way. Have grace on man's imperfections and forgive them for the hurt they unknowingly inflicted on you. I know you haven't consciously been holding them at fault, but now that you're aware, there's action required on your part. So forgive and let it all go.

                                                             *Photo found on Pinterest

The enemy has no power except that which we give him. So take back what was never his to have - your innocence and confidence in prayer. Speak Truth and denounce lies. Live confidently in your Redeemer's embrace.

Be free. Free to pray for those who are hurting without hesitancy on your part. Free to lift your voice to your Abba without fear that you're breaking some unknown rule. Free to boldly approach God's throne because you know that He wants you there.

Come out from behind your protective walls, Innocent One, your Father has set you free!

Warmly,

The woman you'll someday be

"You are not your grades"

                                                            *Unsure of photo credit*

Have you ever thought about how great it would be if you could write a letter and send it back in time to younger you? Pass on advice, encouragement, and hope to the girl (or boy) you remember being? I have. Oh, the list of things I would tell little me!

"Don't watch that kids' movie, Little One. It's gonna give you nightmares and make you scared of the dark for months to come."

"It'd only be three spankings if you'd simply stop freaking out and move your hands away from covering your bootie."

Due to my husband taking a college course this summer, I've been thinking about my own past experiences in school. I was always pretty negative about myself when it came to my schoolwork, thinking I was dumb academically. Not really sure why I thought that way about myself, I always got good grades, but school always intimidated me. 

I began thinking about how different it would be if I was learning now what I had to learn back then, with the knowledge of myself that I have now (oh boy, that was confusing!) I started thinking of all the things I would tell myself at that age about school if I could go back in time.

So I did it. I wrote a letter to younger me...

                             *Rocking my Mickey Mouse sweater in my first (possibly second?) grade school picture

                              

Dear Young One,

I know you're struggling right now, trying to learn what's being taught and feeling stupid when it doesn't make sense. It seems like everyone gets it but you. You're worried there's something wrong with your brain because surely if it worked right you'd be able to grasp these concepts. 

I know you panic when it's time for quizzes or tests. You study really hard, yet never feel confident when the moment comes. You're unable to figure out why you can't seem to remember all this stuff, but the dates and names only reside in your brain for so long then seemingly poof! they're gone. And you once again label yourself a failure in school (despite the fact that you've never received an "F" in your life.)

You don't feel smart. You dread having conversations that revolve around school because that's when you feel you appear the dumbest. When questions start being asked about what you've learned lately or the conversation turns to what others have been learning, you immediately feel like your skin has shrunk and it's suffocating you. You do your very best to avoid all school related conversations in hopes that others won't see you as an idiot.

You have an enemy in school. It's not a kid picking on you or a teacher being mean to you, you're not being bullied or called names. No, your enemy goes by a name consisting of four little letters -  M.A.T.H. Math. Just the name makes you cringe. The pain this enemy inflicts on you is very real, the tears you cry over it are not fabricated. No matter how hard you try or how many problems you do, the answers keep coming out wrong. You know how to add, subtract, multiply, and divide. Those come easy, it's knowledge you have. Long multiplication seems like it will be the death of you, though, because it always comes out incorrect. Somewhere during the long process you forget to carry a number or you add the digits up wrong. However it happens, numbers get jumbled and you can't straighten them out. Math is the one in which you feel you shine the dullest.

Take a deep breath, lean in close, and listen to what I'm about to tell you because it's something I wish I had known at your age. Are you ready? The words I have for you are these - you are not your grades. I know you're feeling stupid, but the truth is you're not. Hang in there, Young One, you're going to get through this.

You're going to graduate one day. Do you know what that means? You made it. You passed your classes. You found your way through all those things that didn't make sense, you had a way to make it work each day, and you kicked it's toosh! When your parents hand you that diploma at your graduation ceremony, it's going to be an incredible feeling. Relish that feeling, hold onto it, tuck it inside. You earned it! That diploma is what you're working towards and it's a goal you're going to reach. One you'll reach a whole year early even (yay for homeschooling!)

*My family and I after my graduation ceremony - my brother's hair rocked, yeah? :) *

Though graduating and becoming an adult doesn't mean your brain's suddenly going to work differently, you will come to a point where you realize it's okay that you don't always know who is being discussed or what event is the topic of conversation. You're going to learn to let people know that, although it sounds familiar, you're not really clear what is being talked about. You'll start asking questions instead of trying to always make it seem as if you know what everyone's talking about or that you're not interested in the conversation. "I don't know" is no longer going to be a sentence you avidly avoid. The cool part? By asking those questions you're going to learn that quite a few others really don't remember this stuff from school either. Which means, you're not so alone after all.

There will come a day, too, when you realize that if you see your math problems as words instead of numbers it's a whole lot easier for you to process. Numbers aren't really your thing, but when they appear as words they become something you can grasp onto. Your brain has to work harder to figure out the data your eyes are feeding it when you're seeing lots of numbers, but you're going to discover that when your brain takes that information of numbers and transforms it into words it becomes much easier for you to understand. If only you could know then what I know now maybe school wouldn't feel so intimidating.

The point is, I know it's hard right now, but don't give up. School won't last forever. I'm not sure you'll ever get to a point where you actually enjoy schoolwork, but you will come to appreciate the fact that you were able to attend and go through it. You'll learn that your brain isn't defective, it simply works differently then you expect. You'll get to know yourself better and it'll help you understand the best learning processes for you.

So take a deep breath, Young One, and live. Go outside and play with your dog, visit the cows and keep giving them names. Run through the yard, jump on the trampoline, ride the 4-wheeler. Wrestle with your momma, spend the day in the field with your daddy, hang out with your brother and sister. Groom your horses, take a bareback ride, spend the day at the stables with friends. Have your best friend over (even though a part of you hates when she comes because then she always has to leave) and go on your adventures. 

There's so much good in your life, don't let school overshadow that. You're not stupid, Young One. You have good grades, you pass all your tests. You're doing good so relax and enjoy being you. No matter what any of your scores in your classes may be, always remember these very important words:

 you are not your grades. 

You're so much more…

Sincerely,

The woman you'll someday be

I believe because I truly believe

I don't know if it was the result of a teaching I heard at youth group or if it was maybe brought on by a devotional I was reading at the time. Whatever the cause, the effect was that in my teen years I was challenged to learn about my faith. I wasn't deciding whether I believe God was real or not, I was seeking to learn what I believe about Him and why do I believe it. I needed to decide for myself that I believe because I truly believe, not because my parents do. I couldn't just use my parents' faith as my own. While the practice of faith/belief by association may work in other religions, it doesn't in Christianity. Being around other believers, my parents having personal relationships with Jesus, going to church - these are all forms of association, but they don't make me a Christian any more than being around the barn with my horses makes me an equine myself.

I thought of it like this : 

My parents and I have this friend in common, Jesus. We all hang out together in a group with others and sometimes we just hang out one-on-one with Him. We all love Him and we talk about Him a lot. 

While I consider Jesus my own personal friend, we became friends in the beginning because my parents were friends with Him. So it's a little like I'm friends with Him because my parents were. But I'm old enough now to develop friendships on my own, ones apart from my parents, so I want to be friends with Jesus simply because He's my friend, no longer because He was friends with my parents first.

I was out to discover my faith. If I was going to share my beliefs with others, I needed to know why I believed this way. I knew that if I was asked about why I believe the way I do, my answer needed to be more than, "It's how I was raised", "because the Bible tells me to", or "I just do." I had to know what I believed and be able to explain it in a way that would make sense to others.

I had this knowledge that when I face trials in life I need to know exactly what I believe and it needs to be mine. If I don't know why I believe what I do, then the storms of life will sweep me away, of this I was certain. So I took the challenge presented to me and I sought out the answers to my questions. I built upon the foundation that my parents had been laying all my life and I came out of the journey with a stronger faith of my own.

Why am I telling you all this? Because as I was driving in the car the other day, Newsboys' song, "We Believe" came on the radio (a song I absolutely love, by the way.) As I was pulling into my drive, singing along with these words that I can feel, I suddenly began to wonder - "Do the people who read my blog know what I believe?" I decided right then that I was going to write this post (though it's taken longer than planned) and share with you my faith. While every post has my faith in and behind it, I'm sure there will be more posts on what it is I believe specifically in the future. For now, I'm going to share it through the lyrics that started it all (you can listen to/watch the song by clicking here if you'd like.)

In this time of desperation

When all we know is doubt and fear

There is only one foundation

We believe, we believe

In this broken generation

When all is dark, You help us see

There is only one salvation

We believe, we believe

We believe in God the Father

We believe in Jesus Christ

We believe in the Holy Spirit

And He's given us new life

We believe in the crucifixion

We believe that He conquered death

We believe in the resurrection

And He's coming back again

We believe

So let our faith be more than anthems

Greater than the songs we sing

And in our weakness and temptations

We believe, we believe

We believe in God the Father

We believe in Jesus Christ

We believe in the Holy Spirit

And He's given us new life

We believe in the crucifixion

We believe that He conquered death

We believe in the resurrection

And He's coming back again

Let the lost be found and the dead be raised

In the here and now, let Love invade

Let the church live love, our God will save

We believe, we believe

And the gates of hell will not prevail

For the power of God has torn the veil

Now we know Your love will never fail

We believe, we believe

These are the Truths my husband and I live by. We believe in the Trinity. We believe Jesus died to save us. We believe He conquered death when He rose again. We believe that He went to prepare a place for us and that one day He'll come back to take us to His home. 

We believe the Bible to be the Word of God. We believe it to be true in it's entirety. This Book is our guide through all life's stages.

These are the things we will teach our children someday. We will lay the foundation in their hearts and lives by the way we live and the words we speak. We will tell our little ones of our friend, Jesus, on day one of them being ours. As they grow up, we'll encourage them to be Jesus' friend too. And someday they'll face the challenge themselves of discovering their faith and making it personal.

May I pass the challenge on to you today, Friend? Do you know what you believe?

He made me clean

On a beautiful Saturday, while my husband was at work, I spent time with my equine pals. I wasn't feeling very good, but I was having anxiety about being home alone so I went to the barn despite my illness. Being around my horses makes me feel better, not so much physically but definitely mentally. So I spent my day with them and I got a good workout from grooming these six friends of mine. 

Bodies curried and brushed off - check.

Hooves picked out - check.

Manes detangled and brushed out - check.

Fly spray applied - check.

Hugs, pats, and muzzle kisses given - check.

Grass grazed before being returned to pastures - check.

Grooming horses is one of my favorite things to do in life. There's something very relaxing to me in this work. Though it doesn't lend stillness to my body and muscles, it does lend peace to my heart and soul.

                                                 

                                                         This is my beautiful girl, Myra <3

Photo Credit goes to Jodi Bodtke with Giving Tree Photography

"There is something about the outside of a horse that is good for the inside of a man." - Winston Churchill

Despite my not feeling well, it was a good day. 

When I went inside for a break to wash my hands, I glanced at myself in the mirror above the sink. My glance became a stare and I began to laugh at myself. I had dirt streaked across my shoulders and face, I had a nice sheen going on courtesy of my sweat, and I was also wearing a good portion of the hair I'd just brushed off a horse.  It's not an unusual look to be sporting after one grooms a horse, I just hadn't realized I was getting quite that dirty.

"Well, the horses may be clean," I thought and giggled to myself, "but now I'm wearing all their dirt."

As I stood there smiling at my reflection, I had another thought. A more serious thought.

"This is what happened to Jesus. He made me clean by wearing my dirt."

In the ways that I had streaks of dirt across my face and shoulders, 

He had streaks of filth on His body from carrying my sin and shame.

Where I was now exuding the scent of sweat brought on by working in the sun, 

He was emitting the foul odor that emanated from my impurities.

How the hair that had once been attached to a horse had transferred itself to my body, 

the filth that had once radiated from my heart had been transferred to Him instead.

For me to become clean, He became dirty. 

For me to be made pure in His sight, He took on the darkness of my sin.

For me to become one of His Redeemed, He became the payment for my ransom.

The business of my day gave way to a stillness of the moment. As I stood at a sink with a mirror above showing my dirty reflection, my heart was reminded to give thanks for all He has done for me. 

He could choose to never answer another one of my prayers, my life could be filled with bad thing after bad thing, and my heart would still resound with the Truth that I have learned. The Truth that He is forever deserving of my love and devotion, my trust and adoration. 

He doesn't have to perform more miracles to make Him deserving of my love. He doesn't have to answer my prayers to make Him deserving of my praise. He doesn't have to heal my hurts to make Him deserving of my trust.

Because the sacrifice that Jesus already paid? It's enough 

In that one sacrificial act of love, my God proved Himself worthy of it all. 

*******************************************************************************

When I was a teenager, I came across a portrayal of Christ's sacrifice that changed how I thought of it. This portrayal made me see it in a whole new light. If you'd like to read it, just click here and allow yourself to once again be awed at the depth of His love for you.

a heavenly military

These last several weeks have been rough ones for me. I've been sick quite a bit, seemingly facing a decline in my health. Along with the physical pain comes emotional and mental distress as well. So to say it's been a trying time would be quite accurate (possibly even an understatement.) There are always good things to be found, blessings in my life every day, but sometimes the pain of my chronic illness becomes so intense that it begins to consume my vision. At these times it's harder for me to see the good due to all the supposed bad that I'm facing. 

Over the course of these weeks, I've found myself frequently questioning God on His plans and whereabouts. I've asked the questions of whether I'll ever find relief or is this pain going to be my constant companion throughout my days. And while browsing through my computer home screen, I came across some words of hope.

They were found in a draft for a blog post that never got finished. I was a little hesitant to share it now due to it's unfinished state. But the message behind the words reached me, so I'm going to share them even if they're not yet a finished product. I pray He will encourage another through them as He did with me. 

********************

Image Via Delvalina Tuanger

For some reason the chorus to Chris Tomlin's "Whom Shall I Fear [God of Angel Armies]" song has been repeating throughout my brain today. At some point while singing it, I began to really ponder the message behind the words. 

"The God of Angel Armies… angel armies. An army of angels. That must be a spectacular sight when they're dispatched from Heaven!" I began to muse on just what it would take for God to send them out. And do you know what I think? The answer is us. I believe God dispatches His angel armies on behalf of His children. We're the ones these beings are sent out to protect.

"Evil can't get close to you, harm can't get through the door. He ordered his angels to guard you wherever you go. If you stumble, they'll catch you; their job is to keep you from falling." (Psalm 91:10-12MSG)

I'm a visual person, so when I tried to picture how this might look, what came to mind were scenes from some of my favorite movies (kind of weird, but I just went with it.) It's these very scenes that actually make the movies ones I can watch over and over again.

You know the scenes I'm talking about, the ones in which it appears that the bad guys have won, but then the music shifts and alerts you that something's about to happen? With that change in music there comes a change in attitude and you begin to anticipate the unveiling of what happens next. Instead of sorrow at the villain winning, you start to feel hope of the hero prevailing. Then it happens; the scene where the bruised and battered hero arises and defeats the vicious villain. 

When Aragorn, Gimli, and Legolas once again take up their weapons against the evil ones and refuse to surrender. They face so many battles against an enemy whose numbers are greater than their own. They fight battle after battle, never giving up. They will fight to the death if death is what awaits them, all with the hope that Frodo (and Sam) will succeed in destroying the ring. It's the scenes where help arrives when they've all but given up hope. 

It's when Sam refuses to give into the Decepticons in Transformers: Dark of the Moon. Instead of giving up, he stands against them even though he's just a normal guy (well… not really so normal, Sam's actually quite strange.) Even though it appears that his friends, the Autobots, are gone from the earth. It's when Lennox deploys with his military units and Epps rallies his group of overlooked heroes all because they refuse to hand over the world to evil's latest attack.

It's the scene where all of the Avengers stand together against Loki and his army to save our planet. Throughout the movie our heroes have squabbles and skirmishes amongst themselves, but when it really matters they band together to fight the villain. Iron Man goes so far as to sacrifice himself for the greater good. And in the way that all good movies go, he survives though he shouldn't. Good wins and Loki's plan is foiled.

Yes, I am aware I'm somewhat of a nerd and that I just revealed it to y'all by using these scenes in my blog post. I'm completely okay with this part of myself. Moving on...

These are the scenes that make my heart race with pride and my skin develop a serious case of the goose-bumps. I have no part in the battles and I'm aware it's only a movie, but it doesn't stop me from cheering the good guys on and rejoicing in their triumphs. Which leads me to this thought - if mere men can write these stories of fiction depicting the heroes defeating their villains and evoke such strong reactions within me, how much greater would my wonder be if I became aware of the angelic forces surrounding me? 

"In my desperation I prayed, and the LORD listened; he saved me from all my troubles. For the angel of the LORD is a guard; he surrounds and defends all who fear him." (Psalm 34:6-7NLT)

There are many accounts in the Bible that speak of God defending and protecting His people. A few that I'll share with you are:

When King Jehoshaphat placed those who led in worship to march before the soldiers, God destroyed their enemies before Jehoshaphat's army ever even made it to the battlefield. (2 Chronicles 20:21-23)

When an army attacked Judah and the king of Assyria sent messengers to their walls to mock Judah's God and His servant Hezekiah, King Hezekiah and the prophet Isaiah responded by praying. God answered them by sending an angel to wipe out their enemy. (2 Chronicles 32:16-21)

When God kept foiling the enemy's attacks on Israel through His prophet, Elisha, King Aram sent an impressive fighting force to kill the prophet. When Elisha's servant woke up and saw the enemy surrounding them, he became afraid."He (Elisha) said, 'Don't worry about it - there are more on our side than on their side.' Then Elisha prayed, 'O GOD, open his eyes and let him see.'" When the servant again looked he was astonished to see the whole mountainside full of horses and chariots of fire surrounding Elisha. (2 Kings 6:8-23)

God heard the cries of His people and He responded. Without Him they would have been defeated. Outside of Him they had no hope. They came to Him outnumbered, afraid, and unsure. The Lord saw their heartache and He moved on their behalf. 

I wonder what it sounds like when an army of angels is dispatched to go fight for and protect God's children. I wonder what it looks like when these angels draw their swords, surround their charge, and take up a fighting stance. I wonder what it feels like to be aware when you're inside a protective circle of God's angle army where no harm can reach beyond their ranks. 

"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." (Ephesians 6:12KJV)

I want to fully grasp this Truth. That my fight is not with man, but with Satan. And the enemy will use whatever he can to defeat me. If he can cause any form of disruption in my life, he will do so. He does not want me to walk in the callings God's placed on my life so he will do what he can to derail me from God's path.

So the next time I feel like the whole world's gone crazy and turned against me, when I feel alone and cut off from any form of help, when everything seems bleak may I respond with praise and worship to my King. I can trust that my enemy will be defeated because the God of angel armies is on my side and He will dispatch these beings to fight for me.

*********************

That's all I have. An unfinished post, but a full message nonetheless. 

Our victories may look different today then they did in Biblical times, 

but they're no less powerful and real. 

God's answer may come in different forms,

 but His answer will always come. 

Our angels will most likely not appear as we've always imagined them to look, 

but that doesn't mean we're not seeing them.

There is always hope. Even in the darkest of days, in the hardest of trials, in the fiercest circumstances. There is always Hope.

May we all be encouraged today by these simple yet powerful words:

I know Who goes before me

I know Who stands behind

The God of Angel Armies 

Is always by my side.

The One who reigns forever

He is a Friend of mine

The God of Angel Armies

Is always by my side.